Many times we have expectations for people or things and many times we are left disappointed, upset, or angry because our expectations are not met, but did we ever think maybe the issue is us? We have unrealistic or unfair expectations for others?
I think that's the case many times. We think our spouse should do this or that, our children should make this decision or that, the preacher should go here and see this person, the church leaders should be spending money on this project or not on this one, our boss should let us do this, or our co-workers should be that, our coach should be running this play, or our friends should be dating this person, or the government should be voting on this issue. Do you see how easy it is when "we think" we know what everyone should be saying or not saying, doing or not doing, being or not being?
I know sometimes in my life I have unrealistic expectations for my wife or my children. I know professionally church members sometimes have unfair expectations of me as their Preacher. I know sometimes I see others who have expectations for others that just aren't right. What has to change? Me and you.
First, we have to realize that we don't have all the answers, our way is not always the right or best way. Secondly, we have to be humble enough to realize that sometimes others know best or are experts in things and we have to allow them to do their job or fulfill their roles. Thirdly, we have to be unselfish enough to realize it's not all about us and sometimes it's not our place, our business, or responsibility to have our nose or hand in each and every situation and take a step back and concentrate on what is our job, responsibility, or business.
How much better could our relationships, workplace, churches, or teams be in life if we'd leave to have accurate, fair, and realistic expectations of people and things? So many times we allow our perceptions or thoughts to dictate our attitudes and we base them on emotions, feelings, or no facts and we expect others to line up with that, and it's never going to happen. I don't like when people treat me that way and I don't want to treat people that way.
What is the answer? Maturity. Change. Growth. We have to learn to reprogram our thinking so our attitude or actions aren't negative or harsh so we don't have expectations that are selfish, wrong, silly, or not based on facts. We have to learn to grow as a person, change our thoughts and perceptions to reality, and mature as a person.
Especially for the Christian, it's time we model the life of Christ and develop an attitude of a servant and treat people with respect, fairly, and not put all our negative or selfish expectations on others, especially in our churches. Jesus out of all people didn't have to be a humble servant, yet He was. Make it a practice to regularly evaluate your expectations of others and see if you are being fair, accurate, realistic, and most of all modeling a Christ-like behavior and attitude. Remember God has expectations for us.
Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love.