Friday, March 28, 2014
How do you see yourself? How do you see others? Sometimes we are self unaware and see ourselves as right when we are wrong or better than we really are at something, and sometimes we go the other extreme and lack self-confidence and think we stink at something or worse than we really are. We also sometimes make the same mistake with others. We expect more out of them than we should, think more highly of them than we should, or we think lower of them than we should, or we have no confidence in them and we should.
It's a crazy cycle, but I think the problem is our perception. For man, perception is reality. What we perceive to be true in our minds is true whether it really is or not. Hence gossip, false witness, hurt feelings, misconceptions, disappoints, and other feelings and emotions because we allowed our perception of a person or situation or ourselves to become reality and truth.
How can we have an accurate perception? How can we know what is true and not true? How can we be humble without being prideful or arrogant? How can we form opinions of others that are fair and on point? I think it begins in our minds.
"As a man thinks so He is" quote says and I think that to be true. When we have life experiences that have clouded our judgments, caused us to have low-self esteem, insecurities, or unhealthy attraction to fantasy, or just plain full or ourselves, it's tough to be logical, accurate, and realistic of self or others.
We have to change our thinking. If we've got issues in the past such as daddy issues, mommy issues, abusive ex, or abusive childhood, we need to deal with it and not allow it to change our perceptions. Not all people are cheaters, abusive, mean, or demeaning. It's not fair to put blanket statements on people, but when we get hurt or are inured especially mentally or emotionally it can alter our perceptions. It can lead us to have trust issues, jealousy, insecurities, etc...so we have to be careful to not dwell on the past or negative thinking. We have to change our minds.
I also think we have to a "ruler" or a measuring stick to know what the truth is, and I think that is God and/or His Word.
Romans 12:3 says....
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.
I think God and HIs Spirit within us(those of us who are saved) and His Word help us be realistic, honest, and have accurate thinking. The keys are in this verse. 1. Don't think too highly of yourself. 2. Use sober(clear) judgment in accordance to the faith God has given you. I think we need to look at everything through this lens of truth. Remove our ego/self and look at it through a clear objective view through God's help.
It is also true that "hurt people, hurt people" meaning when people are hurt and damaged they tend to push that on others and that pushes people away, isolates you, and gives you really bad perception of things. We have to be careful that we don't allow the things that have hurt us to go un-dealt with because it truly will effect our lives and relationships and change our perceptions of reality, people, and events. We all get hurt in different ways, but we must deal with the pain so that we don't hurt others simply because we are hurt.
Perception defined is:
the ability to see, hear, or become aware of something through the senses.
But the issue is our ability. It's up to us to see, hear, or become of aware of things we feel accurately, truthfully, and realistically and not because out thinking is wrong/broke, or because we aren't being guided by God but bad feelings or emotions, or because we're hurt or in pain so it changes our thinking and actions.
I pray we all learn to treat people, situations, and ourselves accurately, truthfully, and realistically with God's help and guidance.